in the last few years a lot of people have tried to work this one out, but still not formed a proper opinion yet. my name is westid. it’s obviously not my real name, because social services would have a whale of a time with something like that i suppose. it is based on my real name though, so there really is such thing as truth and anonymity
i’m a man with male pronouns, but not proudly. i’ve never had a real ‘squad’. i am not a participant in any group chats, even though i am a regular subject in a lot of them. people usually think i’m gay or asexual because i don’t try it on with people, and i know how to keep my hands to myself. i’m not overcompensating by mentioning it; that’s just an ignorant thing about me that some people regularly say
i like computers and my favourite drug of choice is, and always has been, music. nowt makes me feel more alive than slapping on a 20 minute power ballad, queuing up 3 tracks in an album as an whole block because it sounds like 1 long amazing tune, never being able to find my tunes when a jukebox is hanging about, blasting my anus out the wrong end trying to sing some karaoke, as though the end of the world depends on it
only a couple of weeks into the new year, i was diagnosed autistic. that was my fresh new start for 2023.
i come from a place called the valley. in the sweet bosom of east lancashire, the U F of K. even though everyone around here tells me that the place is shit, it can’t be that bad because none of them stopped living here. if you break away from chatting the chit, i think it’s one of the most beautiful places i have ever been in my life
the craic with incorrigo is that it’s my identity. you can either keep up with the face ache, or just be who you are and run the risk of being cancelled. in the criminal justice system, they used to have a status that could be placed upon you at any time, called an incorrigible rogue. you could get thrown in jail for pissing in the street, probably less than that, if they don’t like the look of you. you’re either incorrigible or you’re nothing. nobody can fix you in any way that would make you better or worse. if you mess about with someone that’s incorrigible, it is impossible to change without completely destroying who they are
i like the underdog, me. in other words.
this place is my personal blog, but it’s not personal. it doesn’t affect anyone else in real life. if you think that anything i say might be aimed at you, then rest assured it isn’t. i know a lot of people don’t like me, but there’s nothing i could have done differently in order to prevent that. there is someone that i really like, but they can never know. all they have seen and heard of me is pure hatred, from other people. i don’t even get the chance to fuck things up by myself any more. sometimes the people that you fall for, are the people that you least expect. this person cut through all the bullshit and spoke to me, while everyone else around were drawing up no man’s land and the enemy lines
i’ve had it spelled out to me many times that i am incapable of love. even for the chance of love, to get close to someone who i really care about, who really cares about me. people fly the flag of stoicism and throwing caution to aloof right in the face on the regular; do you wonder if they ever get lonely? is the only way that i can respect and care for someone to man up? i gave it everything i’ve got. it’s all or nothing
next time some sad cunt tries to explain me to you, come and see me. have a proper look and know for definite. what have you got to lose? the worst thing that could happen is that they were wrong, and i can’t see the down side of that
pipe dreams. a fantasy. a shitstorm waiting to happen. pure pointlessness, if only the absence of what that magic feels like, if only to know that life is nowhere near itself without it
i think that sentiment is hope
