Yesterday, I could have written a song about it (unless someone has done so already), but here’s a more detailed version of it; at least until now …
So there I was sat in the front room with three other people, there on official business. They were saying something that everyone was keen and possibly uplifted about. Things like win-win situation, maybe we will see an improvement in the coming months – yknow – shit like that. Anyway, as per I could hear the words they were saying, and if I really really tried hard enough even remember some of the words they used, except though I think context is out of the question – that just didn’t register at all
There are usually things I don’t tell people because there will be an unnecessary / unwarranted reaction or in the very least an aggressively worded response. Yesterday was one of them things from start to finish completely. Just couldn’t wait to dive into the pit and fall gratefully asleep (though from then on, another story developed around that subject)
If repetitious, interconnected, disturbing, leads to waking myself up through injury or noise, tripping up or falling over things because I had got up and started moving around; kinds of dreams keep happening then from time to time the truth starts to seep and ooze into reality. Questions arisen in short order. “What was that about?” Same places, same people, same kind of goings-on. Same themes of these dreams. Same places that don’t exist / could easily exist had I been there. Same story line, same people, same continuity. Point I’m trying to get at here is that this nonsense bleeds into reality to such an extent that I don’t know who or what I am, or what my purpose (yet still, all purpose) is
Waking up obfuscated in the head with all the shit that goes on in there; configures the way that I express myself and there’s no readily apparent normal. Even after all the shit we’ve been through, and over such a stretch; we’re still in it for the duration. If this is a given, then there’s no point in trying to figure it out any longer
When the meter runs out to zero here, we are sent there. When something or other happens to forward this dual-existence, it is often coincidental with aforementioned “other side” of it. Once these things edge further forward – my dear friend spoke of famine and feast. So interchangeable they are, and so testing a wonder they can be
In closure, and with a hint of irony; “why?” never had anything to do with it. Nor time. Nor fact. In an unpredictable way these realities meet only in your heart, pounding adrenaline, and your mind – the most fascinating coincidence of all … the mind. Open your mind. Or something like that. Can never remember the importance or contention. Maybe it’s something more primitive than that. Maybe I don’t want to know. Minds can protect everyone and anyone; discards what you don’t want to know, enchanting you with what you need in your soul. Planes of existence meet somewhere along the line. And this is where I decide to leave it at that …. exit-stentialism
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